Our kids. They're so not good at accepting declarations of love. They have the worst timing.

*hugs them*

Also, interesting musing on the gratitude deal. I think it stems from them both low self-esteem. When Spike accepts his crumbs, it's 'cause he believes that's all he'll get. What's tragic to me is that when he gets his soul, he becomes so insecure that where he once used to overestimate how Buffy felt about him, now he underestimates it the point that he doesn't believe her when she says, "I love you." (I know fans debate that about what he meant, but I think his behavior in AtS S5 supports that he just couldn't believe her and that's so sad.)

That's a nice connection. My only (not deep at all) reaction is that I really like the fact that Spike is polite about being loved- he doesn't take any of her admissions for granted. Graciousness seems like it would be a carry-over from William, and I love that it's one character trait that apparently doesn't shame him. It's just ingrained in him.

I love that scene. SMG and JM nailed it.

M-hm. *muses* For some reason, I want to add "I know you'll never love me. I know that I'm a monster. But you treat me like a man, and that's... Get your stuff. I'll be here."

Well, as the old saying goes about beggars and choosers.

Spike, stop hurting my heart, you evil thing you! *sits on hands to try and keep from cuddling him*

Spike and Buffy should go to a counselor that requires them give each other a hug at least once a day every day as a healing exercise.

That moment in HB was one of my favorites, because it recalled the intimate friendship they had from "Bargaining" through "Tabula Rasa," before the messed up sexual relationship started.

Pretty sure the Hell's Bells conversation was Spike's most submissive scene (and as such relevant to my interests) except for the S5 one with the doorstep. Both are accompanied by surprise!Buffy!kindness, which is also relevant to said interests. Of course, S7 has more non-stop submissive Spike and constantly kind Buffy, but it's generally a bit less vulnerable and more... formal? after he gets a soul, possibly because he's busy being self-loathy and she's busy battling the most immense evil ever. But anyway, the Hell's Bells scene is hotter than hot. (And I still take issue with "no you don't" in Chosen, but "Thanks for saying it" is perfect and perfectly in-character.)

I haven't read the rest of the comments yet, but for some reason a general perusal of this post, before shuffling off to clean my house, reminded me of one of my favorite pieces of dialogue from Seinfeld:

****
Cynthia: There's just no men out there, you know?
Elaine: I know.
Cynthia: I mean the problem is that the good ones know they're good. And they
know they're in such demand they're just not interested in confining themselves
to one person.
Elaine: I hate the good ones.
Cynthia: Is Jerry one of the good ones?
Elaine: That's a good question, I think he thinks he is.
Cynthia: Well, the mediocre ones are available, but they're so insecure about
not being one of the good ones that they're always going, "Well I'm not good
enough for you, what are you doing with me?" and eventually I just go, "You're
right."
Elaine: You know, maybe you need somebody between good and mediocre.
Cynthia: No, maybe I need somebody who has nothing, somebody who just has to
appreciate being with me because he's so desperate.
****


This is not to say that Spike is either a) a good one b) a mediocre one or c) desperate - I'm not really sure what I'm trying to say. Just that Spike's need for affirmation in these scenes reminds me of this scene...

If Buffy were to have an honest conversation with a girlfriend over dinner, would she say Spike thinks he's a "mediocre one"? That's what these scenes seem to suggest... In the simplicity of a Seinfeld break-down :)

I have a fleeting thought! What if Spike's "no you don't" was just his dry British way of teasing her about all of her "no you don'ts"? Affirming by negating? Perhaps he's saying, "You love me now exactly as much as I loved you then. Tag, you're it!"

Yes, this is very random, but the fleeting thoughts must be registered and notarized, or it's as if they never existed.

Oh! Also! He doesn't need to push for more in the HB scene, because she's actually given him something (other than her lying body), unlike during the rest of the season.

KIIIIIIIDS.

That Hell's Bells scene is OTP-tastic. SHIPPIEST POST-BREAKUP SCENE EVER.

I'm of the opinion that Spike was definitely seeing the irony in that "Chosen" moment. Hence, I am inclined to believe that he believed her, even if he didn't believe in her love. (It makes sense in my head.)

Spike...thanks her for admitting that it hurts to see him with another woman. Thanks her. Thanks her.

That's the corollary to you always hurt the one you love, though, isn't it? That if you love someone, they have the power to hurt you. As far as soulless Spike can tell, she is saying she loves him.

I don't have a lot to say that hasn't already been said, so let me just declare my boundless love for the HB scene. That scene is, in my opinion, the most perfect post-breakup scene ever written. The dynamic between the two of them in that scene and Spike's adorable bravado slippage and Buffy's smile and basically everything about that scene is just flawless.

Also, I completely adore this post. All this discussion is making my shipper heart explode in the best possible way. :)