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A Tribute to Willow's Hats

will57
I had some free time in between bouts of fighting crime (my superhero name is "Awesome Kick-Ass Girl". Also known as "aka G". Get it? Yeah, I shouldn't try to make jokes). Anyway, by "fighting crime", I clearly mean "writing about social issues". I've always wanted to write something about Willow's hats, though, as they have given me hours of amusement.

Let's face it: Willow has a rare talent. A gift. It is a brave person who will try to coordinate a hat with their wardrobe. It's an even braver person who will decide to wear the craziest, most outlandish hats she can find.

What depths do these hats reveal about Willow's character?

Well, obviously, she has some bad fashion sense.

Let us honor these brightly-colored crimes against headwear now with a tribute: to Willow's hats.






From Inca Mummy Girl. Because the best thing for a person with red hair to do is wear a red shirt with a red toboggan. This, her first hat, is a fairly tame example of headwear for the Willster.



From Inca Mummy Girl. What manner of hat is this? It's square like a top hat, yet...it's not. It's like someone styled a hat based off a Scion. Fantastic.



From Ted. Clearly, Willow wore this hat in an attempt to impress John Ritter. But this hat seems to be losing its beautifully boxy shape which suggests that it has been through the wash a few times.



From Surprise. Apparently Barney the Dinosaur exploded and a piece of him landed on Willow's head. My main concern is that this hat presents an accident hazard. The cuff threatens to flop over her eyes and...well...she could inadvertently walk into the path of an oncoming Hummer. You never know!



From Surprise. A party is a great excuse to wear a funny hat. But why is Willow the only one partaking in the head-coverage? Can you purchase cheaply-made party hats individually or is Willow planning on using the rest of the package as back-up in case her elastic band snaps?



From Phases. Willow's never afraid to bring out old favorites. The toboggan makes another appearance, though the stripes are ratty. It almost looks as if she's wearing the hat inside out...



From Anne. This is clearly the hat from Surprise, however it seems to be a lot smaller. Either it shrunk in the wash or Willow's head has expanded. Blinding cuff-floppage no longer seems to be an issue. While this apparently excites Willow, Cordelia doesn't seem too sure about it.



From Helpless. I can only conclude that this monstrosity is a cry for help. It is in the episode named "Helpless", after all. It's the orange and yellow pom-pom at the top that really makes this knitted hat pop.



From Helpless. This appears to be another cry for help. I can only imagine that Willow bought a tiny, oddly-colored wicker basket on sale at Garden Ridge and then decided to turn it upside down and wear it on her head. Course, this hat isn't made of wick wicker, but...maybe it should be...



From Earshot. It's fishing! Willow-style. Bucket hats are always in style. Especially yellow bucket hats with little yellow bows on the side. I do assume this hat has magical powers that blocked Buffy's mind-reading abilities in this episode. That would be why Willow chose to wear it, after all.



From Graduation Day Part 2. Sometimes, you wear a silly hat because you want to. Other times, you wear it because you have to. Let's all stop and marvel at how we came to make a hat out of a wall calendar stuffed into some fabric with a tassel off to the side. Is this dignity for our graduates?



From This Year's Girl. I'd be willing to bet that Willow's mom made this hat, inspired by a Rubrik's Cube. I do feel a strange urge to try to get the colors to line up. Willow should wear this hat while slaying vampires. They'd be so distracted in their puzzlement that they wouldn't even put up a fight.



From Fool for Love. I've been mulling over whether this hat is fuschia or magenta. In any case, Willow once again shows a propensity for hats that could potentially flop over her eyes. I would postulate that this points to Willow's conflict-aversive and shy nature as she's often willing to turn a blind eye to reality in order to keep a personal bubble of harmonious life around her...but then everybody would look at me funny.


Non-Willow Honorable Mentions


From Becoming Part 2. This is part of Buffy's criminal wear, and, as far as hats go, it's not a bad one. The reason it makes the list is because I am convinced that she's wearing the damn thing inside out! Look on the right (your right) side of the hat...there's a tag! Honey, that goes on the inside!



From Lies My Parents Told Me. Okay, we all know Anya didn't have much to do after Selfless. But did she have to start making hats out of tea cozies? Shouldn't we draw a line somewhere? Even Anya doesn't seem to confident in her fashion choice here.




Super-special internet cookies (the good kind! not the stalker kind!) to whoever can tell me where the hell my icon picture is from. It does not appear to be from any BtVS episode, though damned if I can place it. My icon's from Veronica Mars! Thanks, deird1, for the info. Obviously, Willow took her love for hats with her when she went on other shows. Also uber-special internet cookies if I've missed a Willow hat from the series...alas, I'm not perfect yet.

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Comments

( 66 comments — Leave a comment )
deird1
Jun. 24th, 2009 02:58 am (UTC)
I'm pretty certain your icon is from the first season of Veronica Mars.



(And I never realised just how many hats Willow wears! *boggles*)
deird1
Jun. 24th, 2009 03:04 am (UTC)
(Screencaps of VM episode!)
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mabus101
Jun. 24th, 2009 03:42 am (UTC)
*looks baffled by talk of hats and fashion*

You know, amusing note on the graduation cap, though. There's a Foundation novel, one of Asimov's last, in which variations on the cap and gown are still standard uniform for Imperial Librarians ten thousand years in the future. So they can't be all that silly, can they? ;-)
gabrielleabelle
Jun. 24th, 2009 03:53 am (UTC)
Well, they can still be silly. It just means that people inherently like to wear silly hats. With tassels.

Or maybe Asimov thought they looked spiffy. Which is also silly.
(no subject) - mabus101 - Jun. 24th, 2009 04:19 am (UTC) - Expand
molly_may
Jun. 24th, 2009 03:52 am (UTC)
This was a most excellent compilation! It's too bad that S6-7 Willow apparently gave up on hats, however this:

Apparently Barney the Dinosaur exploded and a piece of him landed on Willow's head.

is leading me to some frightening speculation, since at the end of "After Life" Willow appears to be wearing Elmo's pelt. What does she have against muppety childrens characters?
gabrielleabelle
Jun. 24th, 2009 03:59 am (UTC)
at the end of "After Life" Willow appears to be wearing Elmo's pelt. What does she have against muppety childrens characters?

rofl! Well, that's apparently a sign of Willow's descent to the Dark Side.

I think Willow has a penchant for fuzzy sweaters. She's worn many over the years. Also, brightly-colored overalls are a thing for her in high school.
angearia
Jun. 24th, 2009 04:24 am (UTC)
I'd like to offer some more hats for your consideration:

Photobucket

Buffy likes her hats the way she likes her men - Evil. Er, I mean black. Wait, I mean she likes her hats to symbolically represent her attraction to men with dark pasts. Yeah, that's it. Or she's this close to boning Gunn. Who knows what the hats mean?!


And though Giles wore less hats than Willow over the years, lets not forget that it's quality over quantity:

Photobucket

Photobucket
penny_lane_42
Jun. 24th, 2009 04:30 am (UTC)
Yeah, I think Giles may, with those two single hats, steal the crown in the bad head-wear department.
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penny_lane_42
Jun. 24th, 2009 04:32 am (UTC)
This made me giggle. A lot. Your commentary was priceless, and since I tend to rewatch the later seasons more than the earlier ones, I sometimes forget just how many ridiculous hats she wore. Always good to be reminded!

Also, Alyson Hannigan is so awesome on Veronica Mars. I want to give every award ever to whoever cast the Echolls family. Most brilliant casting ever with those four, I swear.
gabrielleabelle
Jun. 24th, 2009 04:41 am (UTC)
Yeah, I focus more on the later seasons, myself. Whenever I'm doing a rewatch, though, I'm always hopelessly entertained by Willow's hats in the early seasons. Too bad she stopped wearing them after S5.

And I haven't watched VM yet...it's on my to-watch list!
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snickfic
Jun. 24th, 2009 04:51 am (UTC)
I am boggled by your knowledge of Willow-hats. And the commentary makes me giggle. I assume you've seen that icon floating around of Vi in her striped stocking cap in S7, with text that says something like, "Vi rescued Willow's hats"?
gabrielleabelle
Jun. 24th, 2009 04:56 am (UTC)
Heh...I don't know that trivial knowledge of Willow's hats is a skill I really want to brag about too much...

And Vi is clearly a Willow-in-training.
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(Deleted comment)
gabrielleabelle
Jun. 24th, 2009 10:56 pm (UTC)
I adore the hats! I think they're adorable! The Earshot hat is definitely one of the better ones. Cause bucket hats really are always in style.
beer_good_foamy
Jun. 24th, 2009 05:54 am (UTC)
angearia
Jun. 24th, 2009 07:00 pm (UTC)
Hmm this just raises the question of why Joss likes to hire red-haired actresses and then hide their fiery tresses initially. Is he projecting hair color shame? An inferiority complex about his superiority complex of hair color, perhaps.
(no subject) - gabrielleabelle - Jun. 24th, 2009 11:00 pm (UTC) - Expand
katiebug78
Jun. 24th, 2009 10:27 am (UTC)
Heee - this was awesome. And I love that your icon is actually VM (is that Ruskie Business? Bad at names but I LOVE that ep - Logan's breakdown in the lobby gets me every time). This was too much fun - Willow did really have some horrendous hats, didn't she. Although interesting that she stopped wearing them by S5 - maybe says something about less of a need to hide herself as she grew in self confidence?

Thanks for the fun...
katiebug78
Jun. 24th, 2009 10:39 am (UTC)
Okay - I really need to read the fine print at the bottom of your posts before replying! You have this whole thing there about the icon being from VM! *facepalm* In Ali/Willow/Trina's defence, that hat she is wearing in your icon was because she was hiding from the paparrazi! I think you have another VM icon in your collection - I've seen it. With the caption "Oh, the drama"? Or is that someone else's?
(no subject) - gabrielleabelle - Jun. 24th, 2009 11:01 pm (UTC) - Expand
lusciousxander
Jun. 24th, 2009 11:07 am (UTC)
While those hats are awful, Willow always looked cute in them. *huggles high school!Willow -I miss her*
gabrielleabelle
Jun. 24th, 2009 11:02 pm (UTC)
*huggles her with you*

She does look awesome in them. They're just so...Willow.
eowyn_315
Jun. 24th, 2009 04:42 pm (UTC)
This post is made of win. Willow's fashion sense... is not.
gabrielleabelle
Jun. 24th, 2009 11:03 pm (UTC)
Indeed. Though it gets better!

Well...with a few lapses like the lumberjack outfit of Spiral, Weight of the World and The Gift or the shirt made of Elmo's pelt in After Life...
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lavastar
Jun. 24th, 2009 04:45 pm (UTC)
...why is everyone hating on these hats? I think they're mad stylish.

The sad part being that I'm not even being sarcastic, seeing as I'm the girl who's convinced that everything in her wardrobe matches everything else...

Anyhow - great tribute!
gabrielleabelle
Jun. 24th, 2009 11:05 pm (UTC)
Oh, I love the hats! Much, much love for the hats. They're an integral part of Willow's Willowness. They're just often...interesting...

I'm not very fashionable, myself. I'm just not a big fan of hats, in general, and I often find them easy to mock. :)
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lycoris
Jun. 24th, 2009 05:20 pm (UTC)
I resent that comment about Anya's hat! There is NOTHING wrong with tea cosy hats! My aunt got me one a few years back. I wear it in the winter because it is lovely and warm. I discovered taht everyone in Uni has been saying "Yes, you do know Lycoris ... she's the one with the hat!" behind my back. Perhaps there is something wrong with them after all ...

You're right. There's a LOT of horrible hats on display here. Oh Willow, this is terrible. The wicker Helpless one was definietely the worst, I think.
gabrielleabelle
Jun. 24th, 2009 11:06 pm (UTC)
I've been waiting for someone to have a hat like one of these! *g*

I actually think the pom-pom hat is the worst (just cause...pom-pom!!!). But the wicker hat is close behind it.
(no subject) - eowyn_315 - Jun. 24th, 2009 11:41 pm (UTC) - Expand
skytteflickan88
Jul. 13th, 2009 04:26 pm (UTC)
Great read.
gabrielleabelle
Jul. 13th, 2009 04:47 pm (UTC)
Thanks! :)
me_llamo_nic
Dec. 17th, 2009 09:18 pm (UTC)
How did I miss this the first time around? I think I was already reading your stuff by June. Shrug. I would also honorably mention Giles when the Magic Box opened/Halloween in S6; Buffy in Older and Far Away when she's fighting that demon in the graveyard; and Vi in pretty much every scene she's in. I wish I had pics for them. Ah well.
gabrielleabelle
Dec. 18th, 2009 05:42 pm (UTC)
Buffy actually has a ton of hats in S7. I hadn't remembered that. Also, I missed a Willow hat from S6! I just caught it on my rewatch. Grumblegrumble.
snickfic
Feb. 28th, 2010 01:39 pm (UTC)
I thought you should know that I specifically hunted up this post as a reference for writing a Willow!hat!fic for someone.
gabrielleabelle
Feb. 28th, 2010 06:37 pm (UTC)
Ooooh! Link?
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The One Who Isn't Chosen

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